Super Mario: Legend of the Mushroom Kingdom

Add fan number 4! The story is really good and relatively fast paced. I write this kind of fiction as well. I think our writing styles are strangely similar. The one thing I hate in stories is redundant word usage, and this story completely steers away from it. Word choice is crucial and you have done a really good job!! Keep it up!
 
You guys are the best, seriously. It helps keep me motivated to write.

saxprodigee said:
Add fan number 4! The story is really good and relatively fast paced. I write this kind of fiction as well. I think our writing styles are strangely similar. The one thing I hate in stories is redundant word usage, and this story completely steers away from it. Word choice is crucial and you have done a really good job!! Keep it up!
And sax maybe me and you should collab on a chapter or story sometime?? If you're interested  ;)
We are similar, I constantly check myself for word variation haha
 
Slacker said:
You guys are the best, seriously. It helps keep me motivated to write.

saxprodigee said:
Add fan number 4! The story is really good and relatively fast paced. I write this kind of fiction as well. I think our writing styles are strangely similar. The one thing I hate in stories is redundant word usage, and this story completely steers away from it. Word choice is crucial and you have done a really good job!! Keep it up!
And sax maybe me and you should collab on a chapter or story sometime?? If you're interested  ;)
We are similar, I constantly check myself for word variation haha

I would love to. Word variation is my most nit-picky topic.
 
Chapter 6 - The Underground (Part II) feat. Saxprodigee
Peach awoke on cold, hard ground facing a wall. She wasn’t sure where she was now, but she did know that before that she was in the well before that bob-omb exploded. Her trusty umbrella was lying next to her, so at least she had a weapon if the time called for it. It felt as though Peach was inside somewhere, but she still felt the wind blowing… and rain?

Drip. Drip. Drip.

It was unmistakable, the slight drizzle turned into a steady downpour. The princess turned away from the earthy wall to see an astounding sight. Three Thunder Clouds were whisking around this large room, surrounding the Hammer Bro-like creature. Since she was off to the side, Peach had time to assess and examine the situation without being identified as a threat. The Thunder Clouds had a clear advantage in this fight; their dark gray hue showed their displeasure with the Hammer Bro and only added to their endless supply of electricity.

The Hammer Bro was struggling, every shock of lightning paralyzed him and the water seemed to affect him as well. The constant rain was causing the room to flood, and the water was only rising. Although it would be nice for this scary monster to be defeated, that would also mean the end of Peach as well. Somewhat scared and shaky, Peach stood up. The princess would have to do something extraordinary or some miracle would have to happen if she was going to get out of this room alive.

BOOM! The wall next to the barred door was obliterated and Luigi jumped inside.

“It’s Luigi time.”

Luigi’s new hole in the wall drained the room of water and gave them some breathing room. However, Luigi knew that he had to defeat these monsters in order to open the electronic door in the other room and get the key within it. He wanted to get rid of the Hammer Bro, but he might need him to win this fight. Peach looked over at Luigi—he wanted her to run, she should’ve run—but she didn’t.

Peach dashed towards Luigi looking for some reassurance that the situation was going to turn out positive. After spending a couple of seconds coming up with a plan, Peach had already bolted into the battle scene. Peach jumped high into the air and stayed floating. The wind helped her elongate the floating process as Luigi went to get in position. After a running start from Luigi, he too made a jump and grabbed Peach’s leg. Using her as a “hold” of sorts, Luigi proceeded to pummel the Thunder Clouds with high acrobatic aerial maneuvers. Peach slowly let herself down to the Hammer Bro. to ask for his permission to beat up the hooligans. Although Peach was fighting, she was still a princess at heart, and at times like this, it showed.

In a gruff monotonous voice the Hammer Bro replied, “If you dare.” This fight would forcibly unite them into a forbidden three-way tag team... for the time being.

By the time the conversation had evaporated, Luigi was being cornered by two of the three Thunder Clouds, with one coming towards them.

“Watch out lady, Hammer Toss!” yelled the Hammer Bro as he vaulted his sturdy hammer into the Thunder Cloud.

It went right through the irate cloud but it stumbled upon several rock fixtures overhead the ones surrounding Luigi. Caught by surprise, the lone Thunder Cloud turned around leaving an opening for a direct attack. Seeing the opportunity as it came, Peach once again leapt high in the air using her umbrella as a cushion as she came down with a mighty ground pound. Moments passed as parts of the Thunder Cloud started to dissipate. One down, two to go. Another glance at the opposite end of the room showed to Peach that Luigi’s condition is dire. Luigi’s attempt to run around them was futile and ended up with countless numbers of shocks. The Hammer Bro sprinted into the scene, trying to push Luigi out of the way so the Thunder Clouds wouldn't gain any momentum in this fight.

“Leave me alone! I can take them!” cried Luigi as more shocks came way.

The Hammer Bro replied. “No you can’t! You are already losing this fight for us! Just get out of here and leave these guys to me, the stronger of us two.”

The intense argument continued at a distance from Peach’s perspective. She had to hold in a couple of disturbed chuckles when they got zapped. The happy feeling ended when both slumped to the ground, unconscious. With the thought that the Thunder Clouds would come for her next, she sprung to life and quickly made her way over to the unconscious duo. Grabbing one of the Hammer Bros hammer’s, she fastened it to her umbrella creating an elongated and more powerful version of her umbrella. Wielding her newfound weapon as a sword, she charged towrds one of the clouds and swung at it. Some contact was made, making the cloud smaller. The clouds retreated to another corner of the spacious cavern and begain to slowly flicker hues of yellow and white. While the Thunder Clouds charged up their extremely potent Thunder attack, Peach had made one more swing at them with her umbrella open to maximize the area hit. The smaller of the two clouds had vanished, signaling it’s defeat. The Thunder Cloud was clearly enticed to defeat Peach, sealing away the Power Key that lay behind the door for another spand of time. The furious cloud unleashed his lightning only a couple of feet away to Peach. Peach had hoped to protect herself with the umbrella. When she knew the strike should have hit her she peeked over her umbrella to see the tailing end of the lightning enter the hammer.

“Who would have known this hammer would make a good lightning rod.” exclaimed Peach.

And with that comment she unhooked the hammer and tossed it back at the final Thunder Cloud, ironically electrocuting it to its death.

“Don’t dish it out if you can’t take it.” chanted Peach as the victory she had long desired had become a reality. Slowly the two unconscious lumps came to their senses. When they had both realized that their surroundings were void of anything harmful, they stood up and walked in opposite directions, clearly embarassed by the fact a mere princess had saved them.

Without warning, the Hammer Bro snapped out of his daze, fled the room, and headed straight for the electronic door. Luigi tailed him quickly but was too late—the Hammer Bro already reached the sacred room and had the first Power Key in his hands. This odd creature smiled at Luigi.

“Thanks for the help, I had it covered though. I guess I should introduce myself; my name is Slammer Bro. I’m a new hybrid of Bowser’s. I’m the first of my kind, a Hammer Bro fused with a Metal Box. I will be unstoppable, after me and Bowser find all these Power Keys, we will share their power and take over the entire world. I appreciate you speeding up the process for me and greatly helping me get this first key, so I’ll let you go this time. If I’m out finding these keys and you get in my way again though, I will end you.”

And with that, Slammer Bro sprinted past Luigi with exceptional speed, catching Luigi off guard. The Slammer Bro reached the base of the well and started wall-jumping up it, but he wasn’t in the clear yet.



Author's Note: Thank you to sax for collabing with me on this chapter! He basically wrote the fight with the Thunder Clouds, and it was awesome--if I get a good opportunity to, I will definitely send out PMs to people who I would be interested in collabing with. Anyway, it's another battle chapter, with the first key finally getting released. The part about the underground/well/Toad Town will probably wrap up in the next chapter with Chapter 8 being another Mario chapter.
 
Great fanfic, Slacker!

I gotta say, I've never been into fanfics, but this one has me hooked and excited to continue reading. You've done an excellent job with the word choice and variation; It's very appealing. I don't think I've ever read such a professional-quality fanfic before. Can't wait to read more!

 
Chubzster said:
Great fanfic, Slacker!

I gotta say, I've never been into fanfics, but this one has me hooked and excited to continue reading. You've done an excellent job with the word choice and variation; It's very appealing. I don't think I've ever read such a professional-quality fanfic before. Can't wait to read more!

I think he should continue with these. Maybe attempt to get some published.  ;D (being hopeful)
 
saxprodigee said:
Chubzster said:
Great fanfic, Slacker!

I gotta say, I've never been into fanfics, but this one has me hooked and excited to continue reading. You've done an excellent job with the word choice and variation; It's very appealing. I don't think I've ever read such a professional-quality fanfic before. Can't wait to read more!

I think he should continue with these. Maybe attempt to get some published.  ;D (being hopeful)
lol I wish

TheAntiGuy said:
Do you write this in your spare time?
If so, more people should do this.
Take it into college/school/uni and people will love it. LIKE WE DO  ;D
And yeah I just write in my spare time. I write a bunch, this is the only thing that's fanfic based though.
 
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