Okay, before you read it (if you do):
I have written jack in the past months. It kind of didn't occur to me that I wasn't, until a few days ago.
Today I decided to write something completely wrong, and I think it's horrible. It was made up on the spot, and it's just random thoughts. IT wasn't grammar or spell checked, and I'm kind of nervous about posting it.
Whatever, read it if you want. No f***ing tl;dr's.
I'll do better next time, promise
I have written jack in the past months. It kind of didn't occur to me that I wasn't, until a few days ago.
Today I decided to write something completely wrong, and I think it's horrible. It was made up on the spot, and it's just random thoughts. IT wasn't grammar or spell checked, and I'm kind of nervous about posting it.
Whatever, read it if you want. No f***ing tl;dr's.
Listening to music. Peace at last. The world around me is two opposites, all the time. Every day, it’s either one or the other. Angry, loud and painful. If not, if no one is trying to mock each other, it’s dead quiet. So quiet it’s cold and empty. I don’t know how an open balcony residential house could be like that in mid-day. But it was.
Music makes everything better. I like to listen to music. It keeps me away from all the people, the people I don’t like. The people who try to get under my skin. Their attempts to get a reaction. I could react, and I would. If I were not so weak and not so secretive. All reacting would do was send me home with a sick stomach, and horrid thoughts. Thoughts that come too many, too fast and too regretful. Even my music couldn’t cover that.
I don’t like all music. Only some artists, that I’ve selected by either want or by a discovery. I listen to few artists. But I listen to everything they’ve done. You’ll never know when you discover that brilliant song, that was never singled and on the radio. Still, I can’t stand most of what’s on the radio today. Pop songs aren’t ‘pop’ anymore. It’s all usually loud, repetitive beats with pathetic lyrics and no meaning. I find it disgusting.
Everyone listens to it. It’s on their iPods. I get angry, well, in my mind. But deep down, I don’t care. My mind is already too busy on other thoughts. Music brings me thoughts. Good thoughts and bad thoughts. Ideas I should do, and ideas I should’ve done. It reminds me. It makes me miserable. It makes me worse than I already am.
…
Nevermind. I need to relax sometimes, and let things go. Let those thoughts go. Sometimes I can’t. Usually I don’t.
…
But what about the good thoughts? Sadly, I think they’re less common than the bad thoughts. The good thoughts can be really good too. Like, for example, today I asked myself, “Can I still write?”
Music makes everything better. I like to listen to music. It keeps me away from all the people, the people I don’t like. The people who try to get under my skin. Their attempts to get a reaction. I could react, and I would. If I were not so weak and not so secretive. All reacting would do was send me home with a sick stomach, and horrid thoughts. Thoughts that come too many, too fast and too regretful. Even my music couldn’t cover that.
I don’t like all music. Only some artists, that I’ve selected by either want or by a discovery. I listen to few artists. But I listen to everything they’ve done. You’ll never know when you discover that brilliant song, that was never singled and on the radio. Still, I can’t stand most of what’s on the radio today. Pop songs aren’t ‘pop’ anymore. It’s all usually loud, repetitive beats with pathetic lyrics and no meaning. I find it disgusting.
Everyone listens to it. It’s on their iPods. I get angry, well, in my mind. But deep down, I don’t care. My mind is already too busy on other thoughts. Music brings me thoughts. Good thoughts and bad thoughts. Ideas I should do, and ideas I should’ve done. It reminds me. It makes me miserable. It makes me worse than I already am.
…
Nevermind. I need to relax sometimes, and let things go. Let those thoughts go. Sometimes I can’t. Usually I don’t.
…
But what about the good thoughts? Sadly, I think they’re less common than the bad thoughts. The good thoughts can be really good too. Like, for example, today I asked myself, “Can I still write?”
I'll do better next time, promise